Childish Vendettas
by cougarlips
Summary: the "i put salt in your coffee when you were in the bathroom and you drank it all and that was hardcore want to go out sometime" seiner au. third person pov. modern day college au. seiner with side pence, olette, and roxas. oneshot. crossposted on ao3.


**a/n** : haha tfw when you're in rarepair™ hell

the "i put salt in your coffee when you were in the bathroom and you drank it all and that was hardcore want to go out sometime" seiner au

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"Hayner, why do you keep glaring at that guy?"

Hayner grit his together, eyes glued to the blonde three tables over. "I grew up with that jackass."

He watched Olette crane her neck from his left and then snort. "His name is Seifer, Roxas," she told him. "Hayner made him his arch-nemesis in elementary school and Seifer's never let him live it down."

"Oh, shut up," Hayner snapped to another round of laughter. "He's an _ass_."

"Only to you," Pence added sagely, a grin on his face. "He was only mildly unpleasant to everyone else."

Finally looking away from Seifer, Hayner narrowed his eyes at Pence. "He broke my hand," he said, waving his fingers in front of his face for good measure, " _and_ gave me a concussion that took me out of school for a week."

Olette tucked a strand of hair behind her ear with a roll of her eyes. " _You_ broke your hand, Hayner, and don't leave out the fact that the only reason you broke your hand was because you were punching him in the face."

"Yeah, and he gave you that concussion after you fractured his eye socket." Pence squinted over the tables to catch a glimpse of Seifer before he frowned. "Aw, Rai and Fuu aren't with him. Where do you think they are?"

Hayner stood up with a pinch to his mouth, scraping the bottom of the chair across the floor. "I'll be back in a few minutes," he said, turning his glare on each of his snickering friends. "I need to see if I can find new people to hang out with."

Pence grinned at Hayner's retreating figure. "He just doesn't know when to let go, does he?" he asked.

Roxas eyed Seifer, curiosity quirking his brow when he caught the other man watching Hayner exit the cafeteria. "So what's their story?" he asked them. They met each other's eyes with exasperated looks.

"We've got a bet," Pence elaborated. "I think Hayner likes him - he gets all red whenever someone mentions him and the guy's the only thing Hayner talks about-"

"And _I_ think Seifer just likes teasing Hayner," Olette interrupted. "They've had this prank war going on since middle school, and the most emotion I've ever seen on Seifer's face has come from watching Hayner get pissed that he's always one-upped."

"That Dreist's?" a voice cut in, and the three looked up to see Seifer striding towards their table, pointing at the styrofoam cup of coffee on the table.

Roxas barely registered the grin on Olette's features as she nodded before he watched Seifer smirk, tearing open at least a dozen salt packets. "It's not my best work, but I wasn't expecting this opportunity so soon," he said, his eyes flashing to Pence and Olette before glancing up at Roxas.

"I assume you're giving this kid the cliff notes?" he asked the pair. Unblinking, he began pouring the salt into the steaming coffee.

"It's Roxas," he said, and Seifer shrugged, using his free hand to wave him off.

"Don't care," he muttered, eyes darting to the doorway. He pulled a plastic spoon from his bag and gave the coffee a quick stir. "How's Chickenwuss doing these days?" he asked, removing the spoon and keeping his eyes glued on the doorway.

"Careful, now," Pence laughed. "Someone might think you care."

"I just might," he said lazily, cursing when he spotted Hayner's silhouette in the doorway. He sprinted back to his table, just barely sitting down before Hayner rounded the corner and dropped into his chair with a heavy sigh.

"No new friends," he admitted heavily. As he wrapped his fingers around the coffee in front of him, everyone's breath stilled.

He paused when the coffee touched his lips, his eyes narrowing across the room at Seifer as all four of them watched him gulp down the liquid. Just for show, he crushed the empty cup in his hands.

Roxas watched with wide eyes as Hayner and Seifer both stood up, walking to meet halfway in the cafeteria. Seifer stood a head taller than Hayner, his white blonde hair striking against Hayner's dirty blonde.

"You're losing your touch if that's all you could come up with after all summer, Almasy," Hayner told him, crossing his arms over his chest.

"It was short-notice," Seifer replied. He rolled his eyes over Hayner before nodding appreciatively. "Your face healed up pretty well."

"Yeah, well, yours is still pretty messed up," Hayner shot back. Roxas saw Pence press his lips together to keep from laughing aloud at their display. "You should think about seeing someone about that."

"I don't know," Seifer mused. Roxas thought he could understand what Olette believed when he saw the light in Seifer's cool eyes. "You seem to like it well enough, as much as you look at it."

Then again, Roxas saw Pence's point as well: at that, a flush crept up from Hayner's neck, flooding his face with a red glow. He sputtered a response before Seifer suddenly grinned, raising one hand to tug at one of the curls falling into Hayner's face.

"I'll be honest," Seifer teased, "I didn't think you'd drink the whole thing."

"Like I'd lose to the likes of you!" Hayner snapped, shoving Seifer's hand out of the way, bringing forth an even wider grin on the taller man's face.

"And I'll bet your stomach appreciates the fact that you refused to back down from the challenge," Seifer scoffed.

"Y-yeah, well," Hayner managed, "I don't know what you're talking about."

From Roxas's side, Pence couldn't stifle his laugh. "Smooth, Hayner!" he called, and the flush on Hayner's skin deepened.

Seifer's eyes grazed over Hayner's form once more before locking on his eyes. "The winner deserves a fresh cup of coffee, don't you think?" His face soured as Hayner's eyes darted to the coffee station before he added, "A _real_ cup of coffee."

"Are you-" Hayner began, stopped, opening and closing his mouth like a fish before Seifer laughed - a hearty, bellowing laugh that echoed around the room, his head thrown back to reveal the pale column of his neck.

"I am, Chickenwuss," he confirmed. "I think we're about fifteen years late, so give me an answer, will ya?"

"I - sure," Hayner said dazedly, blinking as Seifer dropped his arm heavily across his shoulders.

"Well, then, we'd best get going before this gets physical in a way we'd rather it not," Seifer said, steering him past Roxas, Pence, and Olette and out of the cafeteria.

As they exited, Pence and Olette each exchanged five dollars with shocked looks on their faces, much to Roxas's amusement.


End file.
